Dear Jlo, if you are reading this, you are amazing and I love your hoop earrings and that you are from the block. For everyone else reading this- round two on how to get yo’ (wo)man before next weekend’s celebration of love is here. JLO is hot and had plenty of spicy lovers so we’re on taking some tips from her:

A. She believes that Love Don’t Cost a Thing.  To show your potential dates that you are fun and won’t break the bank, you can make a reservation here.  I’ve heard it’s awesome… I just don’t want to be there for when your stomach disagrees.

B. Her skin looks like that of a {freshly changed} baby’s bottom. I’m incredibly partial to slathering coconut oil on my face to keep it glossy in this frigid weather.  Supposedly coconuts are good for that kind of thing.  Other things with coconuts in them that I enjoy that may or may not help with the glow of your skin are:

C. If she wants to floss she’s got her own. Have you seen those teeth she’s flauntin’?  Keep some floss with you, because nothing says kiss me like spinach between your dentures 😉

This also comes in pink for a great Vday gift!



Midwestern Lovin

So, Valentine’s Day is coming up, and I thought I’d put some posts together on how I plan on attracting some top tier talent.

1. Dress to Impress

combo layers

This look is what I call “layers of love.”  What man (or woman for that matter) doesn’t want to find out what kind of interesting stuff is lurking under there.  I’d like to believe men, as rational as they are said to be, would appreciate this affective way of staying warm in frigid Ohio weather.  This screams, “I’m an independant woman and can stay warm on my own.”  Hot.

P.S. Don’t forget the frames.

Try it out and let me know how it goes!

((but really I love this jacket so much..unfortunately the shop doesn’t make them anymore, but I love this one if you want similar frump-de-lump allure)


Midwestern Lovin